Is Jesus Enough?

Here's a follow up from my last post.

01-11-14

Dear God,

 I think you are finally getting through to me. My mind keeps harping on this best friend thing. Why do I want one? Because I want to be known intimately. I want to be able to air my dirty laundry - my shortcomings, struggles, temptations and weaknesses - and still receive acceptance, love and compassion from the one who hears it all. I want someone who can say "I understand. I can help." Saying all of this to you, I know feel kind of silly. You are that someone. You are able and willing to be all that and more if I will just let you. You are enough. I keep telling you that "I need this" and "I need that" - that I need things other than you, things apart from you. And you are kindly and lovingly showing me that no, I don't. You know my needs and you want to meet them with your vast stores of love, compassion, acceptance and wisdom. You are always with me. You will never forsake me. You can answer and help and encourage. You will always listen You are enough for me. Thank you, Jesus, for showing me that I have not internalized this truth. Help me to remember this truth and live it. 

                                                                                                       Love,

                                                                                                      Megan

On Becoming Poor in Spirit

I have been terrible at regular posts. I'd like to blame the busyness of the Christmas season but I must also admit a bit of a lack of inspiration. Anyway, after yesterday's church service I felt a desire to write a letter to God as a response. I thought I'd share my heart with you today.

01-05-14

Dear God,

Thank you for reminding me this morning that I need to be humble before you and trust you to provide for my needs. I admit that I have gotten into the habit of pretending I am the expert on what I need and also pretending that I must also figure out how to meet my needs myself. I struggle a lot with independence (or rather willingly depending on others). Please forgive my pridefulness. I was not created to live life on my own or in my own strength. I know that my current desire for a deep friendship with another woman - a best friend if you will - is known by you. You know my needs and wants before I can verbalize them. I need to trust you to handle it. This is me admitting my dependence on you to meet my needs. Lord, give me what I need. I trust your wisdom and timing. Show me my next step - here I go wanting to do something. Help me to lay down a doing mentality and simply rest at your feet, accepting your gifts as you give them.

                                                                                                        Love,
                                                                                                       Megan

One Struggle of a SAHM

Yesterday as I was scrolling through my Facebook feed I came upon a blog post from a stay-at-home mom. She was talking about how blessed she is to have someone come to her house and do a few hours of housework or babysitting every once in a while so that she can get out or clean or whatever. She mentioned the Titus 2 paragraph about relationships between older and younger women. As I was reading, I found myself whispering Yes!

Constant supervision is a must with a 1 year old!

I, too, am a stay-at-home mom. I, too, love my children and feel blessed to be able to spend the majority of my time with them. But, oh, how I would love a breather every once in a while. It would be so nice to be able to go to the grocery store alone during the day. Or head out to the post office. Or even just clean my house knowing that the kids are supervised. Yes, I have a husband who is willing to watch the kids while I run out in the evenings or on the weekends but he works all day too. He needs rest just as much as I do. And we both want to spend time together as a couple and together as a family. I usually feel rushed when I'm out and about if I know Adam is at home with the kids. I don't want to burden him longer than necessary.

It seems like it is becoming more and more common for families to live long distance from one another. That's our current experience which means that we get a break mostly when we hire a babysitter. Our families offers to watch the kids when we are all together either at our house or theirs but we see them so rarely I feel bad leaving them to go do something on my own.

For a long time I have felt that I shouldn't ask for help. This was my parents' situation when I was growing up - living far away from family and doing it all on their own (though maybe they did get breaks from kind, supportive people and I was too young to remember). Part of it is pride. I feel like I'm not "doing my job" if I'm not primary caregiver 24/7. But no one works all day every day without getting run down or slipping in their quality of job performance (note to self).

Now my mindset has shifted. I know that it is good for everyone if I accept offers of assistance. I am becoming more okay with receiving gifts of service with the knowledge that it is not a debt to be repaid but a blessing to accept with thanksgiving.


Any stay-at-home moms who would also like to be blessed like this? Anyone who has been blessed and would like to share? Anyone blessing a mom in this way? I'd love to hear about it!