My Goals for 2017

  Last year I was fairly ambitious with my goal setting. I was not successful in keeping them all perfectly, but the real aim is improvement and growth. Normally I would beat myself up for failure but I have been growing in my understanding and acceptance of grace.

  Last year I also learned more about trusting God and the importance of rest. I still struggle with choosing rest over productivity at times but I am seeing the benefits of resting and trying to rest in the knowledge that my worth and value and acceptance are not based on achievement. I have subtitled 2017: The Year of Less. With all of that said, this year's goal list is short.

1. Call one family member each week.

  For some people this is something that is a regular part of their life. That is not the case for me. My family is spread out, mostly on the western side of the country. I see some of them about once per year. My immediate family has never really been one for regular communication - we don't have a history of contacting one another unless there's something important to share. Since I've had kids, we have had a little more frequent contact, mainly Facetime/Skype so my parents can see the grandkids. But anyone with small children can tell you that not a lot of important information is able to be communicated while conversing with toddlers and preschoolers.

Facetime with my niece

  Last year I struggled a lot with loneliness and a desire for greater community. I realized that I could do something to feel more connected with my family members - more regular communication. I'm not a huge fan of talking on the phone (part introvert, part distraction from my kids), but it's the most effective option for me at this time. I would like to feel like I am more aware of what's going on with my family and hope that this will improve our intimacy and connectedness. 

  I have thus far called a different family member each week and have enjoyed catching up. I can tell it surprised them to have me call randomly. One person was concerned that something was wrong because I was calling them (proof I should call more often). I think I will enjoy this goal very much. Even if I don't manage to connect with someone weekly, I will benefit from more regular contact however frequent it ends up being.

2. One date night with my husband each month.

  Again, I realize that some may see this as a low bar, something they easily achieve. Once again, not for me. It's not that we struggle with wanting to spend time together away from the kids. We enjoy date nights. In the past our schedules have been too full to have time for a date. We also have to find a babysitter every time because we don't have family nearby. With finding a babysitter, our date night costs are greater than we'd like sometimes. But money should not be what keeps us from having some fun, maybe even an adventure, to keep us connected.

  It helps that our kids are older and easy to babysit. They're practically self-sufficient. Having it as a goal will hopefully helps us to keep date night a priority in our minds. We've already had to reschedule January's date three times (once for weather, once for a change in plans, once for babysitter conflict). Not a huge deal as we haven't settled on an official plan. I am finding it humorous (and not surprising) that the first one is taking so much time and effort. The enemy enjoys trying to thwart our efforts. Knowing there are eleven other dates to plan is helping me to think of things we could do or places we could go for a different experience. It is exciting!

  Additionally, we are working toward going on a couple's vacation this year. We haven't had a real vacation without the kids since before we had kids (so at least 7 years). We did have a day trip in Sedona and a couple of days in Yellowstone a few years back but I'm talking about taking a plane somewhere where we're completely out of contact for a bit. I'm definitely looking forward to this!

  So those are my official goals for the year. It appears the focus is on relationships. It seems like a natural segue after all of my loneliness talk last year. I felt that these goals were Spirit-led so I am excited to see what happens.

  I do still want to work on blogging more regularly and being present with my family at home. There are always a myriad of possible improvements in my life but I recognize that I don't have to do it all at once (or, actually, do it all period). I'm also still going to make sure reading is a regular part of my life as it's something that helps me relax and refresh but I don't have a set goal for books this year.

  I do also have a goal (desire) to finish my book revisions and have it available online before May. It has a deadline so it's a little different from my regular goals. We will see how that goes.

What are your goals for 2017? Have you made so many that you feel overwhelmed before you started? Perhaps cut the goals in half (or by half)? Remember the spirit of setting goals - motivation to work on something you want to improve in your life.

October Book Review

There are only two months left in 2016 and they are the busiest two of the whole year. I don't anticipate having much time to read so I tried to get as much as I could in during October. I completed eight books. You can read more about them below. If you want to read previous months' book reads, click the appropriate link:  January,  February,  March,  April,  May,  June,  July,  August,  September.

1. When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi

  I had heard a lot of positive recommendations but didn't know a thing about it until I started reading it. I actually thought it might be a fiction book. It is most definitely not. It is about a thirty-six year old neurosurgeon resident who received a lung cancer diagnosis during his last year of residency. Despite the depressing circumstances, I really liked the content of the book.
  The first half of the book focuses on his life before the diagnosis. I learned about his family history, his college passions and experiences and his experiences in med school and residency. I found it fascinating his experiences, his reasons for taking the path he chose, as well as the way his experiences changed his understanding of the mind, personage and death.
  The second half talks about his life after the diagnosis with the last part being written by his wife to share what he was not able to recount because he passed away. It is inspiring all that he learned from his experiences and so eloquently shares with us through his book. It causes you to think about how you are spending your life and what might be the best use of one's unknown amount of time on earth.

2. Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert

  A lot of people had said good things about this book as well. I didn't care much for Eat, Pray, Love but thought I'd check it out since I heard it reminded the reader that they already have permission to create. It seemed like a good book to read while I am in the process of pursuing writing with more purpose and dedication.
  I found it to be an inspirational and encouraging book for anyone who is interested in pursuing a passion in their life. I did not agree with everything she said or thought but found a lot of helpful information, including the reminder that we do not need permission to pursue our passions; we were created with passion and creativity as part of our makeup. If you have a dream you desire to pursue but need some encouragement, motivation or inspiration, definitely check out the book.

3. Setting Their Hope in God: Biblical Intercession for Your Children by Andrew Case

  This is a book that contains numerous prayers for parents to pray for and with their children. Interspersed among the prayers are quotes about prayer - it's purpose, benefits, etc. I enjoyed having a daily reminder and opportunity to pray for my children. I am not always great at making intentional, purposeful prayer time for my children. This enabled me to think about them and their needs and have directed prayer that could lead me into more specific prayers for each of my children. It was an enjoyable exercise that I usually did shortly before bed.

4. Love Warrior: A Memoir by Glennon Doyle Melton

  I had read Carry On, Warrior several years ago and enjoyed it. I was not a regular visitor to Momastery so most of the essays were new to me. I wasn't exactly sure what to expect in this book. I had heard that it would be a chronicle of Glennon's marriage to Craig. Anyone familiar with Momastery would know the bones of the story - how Glennon found herself pregnant and at rock bottom and choosing to start fresh for the sake of her baby, how she and Craig chose to marry, that there was some News a few years ago that Craig shared with Glennon that they had to work through.
  The gist of the story was known, but it was very interesting to have the details fleshed out and to learn more of Glennon's history, the pivotal moments in her life and the origin of the sayings attributed to her (We can do hard things. Do the next right step.) I was a little uncomfortable during parts of the story. I felt that the book resolved well and contained quite a bit of encouragement and inspiration for the reader. If you like Glennon's previous writing or have followed her for awhile, you would probably enjoy this book.

5. At Home in Mitford by Jan Karon

  A friend of mine said that this was one of her favorite book series. I trust her opinion so I decided to check it out. I haven't read a lot of Christian fiction lately. I got kind of burned out on some of the authors and genres within Christian fiction. This one, however, was quite refreshing and unlike what I've read this year.
  This book (the first of The Mitford Series) follows the daily life of Father Tim, an Episcopal priest in the small town of Mitford, North Carolina. The reader experiences the daily, unpredictable schedule of the rector as he seeks to care for his parishioners and members of his town. He acquires a stray dog who is disciplined by scripture, a rambunctious boy whose grandfather is stricken with pneumonia and many secrets of the inhabitants of Mitford.
  I became fond of all of the characters in the book and enjoyed the twists and turns of the story the author led me on. When the book ended, I had so many questions about various characters and want to know what happens next. Thankfully there are twelve other books in this series so hopefully I will get to become even more acquainted with and delighted by this town. The book is an uplifting and encouraging read that makes me yearn for small town living.

6. Listen, Love, Repeat: Other-Centered Living in a Self-Centered World by Karen Ehman

  I saw a Facebook posting about applying for the launch team for this book. The title of it struck me and I knew I had to check out the book. I received a PDF of the book to read and review but I love the message so much that I have pre-ordered a copy of it for myself (it releases November 15th) to be able to have on hand and re-read as I anticipate doing regularly.
  This book is full of helpful and doable advice about loving the people in our life. She shares her experiences with looking for opportunities to love and serve others in meaningful ways. She reminds us that the purpose of our love and service is to reflect Jesus. She is such a genuine and caring person, like a mentor you didn't know you needed. Her words resonated with me and encouraged me as I desire to live out God's greatest commandment of loving him and loving others.
  I would highly recommend this book to anyone who desires to know how to better love those around them - family, friends, kids' friends, neighbors, co-workers, and the "necessary" people in our lives (mail carrier, garbage service, teachers, etc).

7. On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft by Stephen King

  I had heard that this was a great book for writers, fiction or non-fiction. It is part autobiography, part information and advice. I really enjoyed hearing about Stephen King's life and his interest in writing from an early age. I enjoyed hearing about his writing process and how he fleshes out ideas.
  I do not have a desire to write fiction but a lot of his writing information is applicable to writers of all types. I have read one of his fiction books and watched a couple of the movies adapted from his books. Horror is not my genre of choice for books or movies but my genre preference does not matter as far as receiving useful information from this book. If you are a writer or desire to improve your writing skills, I would definitely recommend reading this book.

8. First Comes Love by Emily Giffin

   I think I have read one of her other books but was not familiar with her style and storytelling. I knew she was a Georgia author and I loved that this book was set in Atlanta so I recognized the places mentioned. This book is told from the alternating perspective of two sisters, Josie and Meredith. Fifteen years ago their older brother Daniel was killed in a car accident and it has affected their relationships with one another and others. Meredith sees Josie as irresponsible and self-absorbed while Josie views Meredith as a judgmental perfectionist. Josie's been carrying around a secret that may completely tear their family apart.
  I enjoyed the two-person perspective as it allows the reader to see each person's strengths and weaknesses. I had no idea what the secret might be and enjoyed learning about each sister's lives and their own fears and concerns. It was a good story that held my attention throughout the book. It's a good fiction read.

I am amazed that I finished six non-fiction books this month! Some of them I had begun in September (or earlier in one case) so it's perhaps not as impressive as if I'd read them from cover to cover in October. It was a fairly diverse selection of books. They all had something beneficial to share with me. How many books did you finish in October? Please share any that you would recommend!

August Book Review

School has been back in session for a month. This means new routines and activities which cut back on my free reading time. However, I still have evenings and some weekends to get some relaxed reading in. I only read two books in August but that's probably two more than many people. Below is the list along with my thoughts. To read previous months' book reviews, click on the month: January, February, March, April, May, June, July.

1. Do Over: Rescue Monday, Reinvent Your Work, and Never Get Stuck by Jon Acuff

  I bought this book last spring when it came out because I thought it would be a useful book even though I wasn't currently (nor am I now) working in a paying environment (SAHM). I am now beginning the process of republishing my book and (hopefully) writing a second book. It's definitely the beginning of a potential career and I thought the book might be helpful.

  The book was VERY helpful. In it Jon talks about creating and/or building a Career Savings Account. He goes in depth on the four components: Relationships, Skills, Character and Hustle. I enjoyed taking stock of these components in my own life and seeing where I need to build up or strengthen.

  Reading through the book helped me think about what I will need (and need to do) to accomplish my goals. It motivated me to put in the work that will be required and gave me hope that I can be successful in my endeavors.

  If you are feeling kind of "blah" whatever your work situation, I would suggest checking out this book. It may motivate you to figure out why you are not enthusiastic in your current situation and help you take steps toward a more enjoyable work life.

2. The Fringe Hours: Making Time for You by Jessica N. Turner

  When I first heard about this book I was quite excited to read it and discover new ways I could fit in a little personal refreshment into my day. I especially wanted to figure out how to make time to work on writing - books, blogs, notes, etc.

  It seems kind of funny to think that I had to read this book during my current "fringe hours" in order to learn how to utilize them well. And actually, reading the book was a great use of my time. I found the book to be very practical and encouraging. It reinforced the importance of taking time for yourself to pursue passions and to rest/reflect/pray.

  The book has questions for reflection and response at the end of each section to help you think about how you can apply and make relevant to your own life the things discussed in each chapter. I think it's a great book for anyone who doesn't know how to find or make time for personal goals and endeavors in their current schedule.



I only read two books in August but I felt they were both geared toward helping me to work on my goals. They offered excellent advice about working smarter and making time for what's important to you. I would love to hear of any books you've read that are beneficial to achieving your dreams.

June Book Review

At the time this is published, we will be half-way through the year! Before May began I was already half-way through my goal of fifty books in 2016. At the beginning of the month I was at 34 for the year. I added eleven more to it this month! That means I only need to read five more books in six months...I think I can handle that (can you tell reading is a passion and way to relax for me?). Below are my reads. If you want to check out my thoughts on previous months' reads, check out the blog posts from January, February, March, April and May!


1. Walking the Talk: A Parent's Guide to Intimacy and Healthy Relationships by Sarah West

  (Full disclosure: I agreed to read this book in order to write a review and help with the relaunch of this book.) I was curious to read this one because it's a book about how to talk to your children about sex and relationships in a healthy, Christ-focused way. I have two young kids and I have constantly wondered when I need to broach this subject with them. I don't want to start too early or too late. 

  Sarah does an excellent job of walking parents through this subject. She invites the reader to think about how they were introduced to the topic of sex themselves and the messages they were given from their parents, friends or relatives. She acknowledges the awkwardness parents feel, especially if they haven't been perfectly pure in their own relationships growing up. She reminds us of how important it is for us to talk to our kids about it so that we will always have a voice in the conversation and offers suggestions of how to do it.

   The book is formatted with discussion questions at the end of each section to discuss as parents or in a small group study format. It also has an application section following the questions.

   I consider this a good resource for parents to help prepare themselves for discussing sex and healthy relationships with children at any age and as they age. I look forward to referencing it as I begin and continue to dialogue with my own children.

2. A Heat of the Moment Thing by Maggie Le Page

   I have been steadily going through the fiction on my kindle. This was one that I had purchased but didn't know much about. It quickly sucked me in. Becky Jordan is getting ready to start her dream job in London. A few days before she begins, she hits her head on the end of the pool and is rescued by a mysterious swimmer with an unmistakable voice. The day she starts her new job she learns that her swim hero is actually her new boss. After the last dating fiasco at her old job she is determined not to get involved with a co-worker, especially her boss, regardless of how enticing he may be. It's an engaging read that moves along quickly.
   Part way through the book I realized I was waiting for the relationship rift that occurs in most books involving romantic relationships. I guess being a reader as long as I've been, it shouldn't be surprising that I've gotten used to the general rhythm of books. I was a little perturbed at the predictability at first, but then realized that if the book didn't follow my expectations, I would be sorely disappointed at the ending of the book (or show or movie). So, I was glad that this book, like many others, had an ending that I was pleased with. It's a fun summer read.

3. Between Us Girls: Navigating College Life as a Christian Woman by Megan Byrd

   Yes, this is my book. I published it a little over four years ago. I don't think I have read a hard copy of it since I completed the editing process. I find it very weird to read my own work. I was afraid that I would not like it after all of this time has passed (I actually finished writing it in January of 2010, a couple of months before my first child was born). I am considering republishing it and wanted to go through it to see what might need to be changed or updated, wondering if some of my thoughts had changed in six years.
   Overall, I still felt confident in the content and message. I think I would like to add additional personal anecdotes to the various sections and may want to rearrange the chapters a little. There was only one chapter that I think could be organized better. However, I still think it is a book that is honest about college life and can provide helpful advice for Christian women getting ready for or already at college.
   (Shameless plug: I currently have the only available copies of the book and would be happy to mail one to someone you know who could use it. It would cost $10 plus $3 to ship. Comment on this blog post or email me at mybyrdlife at blogspot dot com.)

4. My Own Miraculous: A Short Story by Joshilyn Jackson

   I borrowed it from my library as an audio book. I hadn't read anything by Joshilyn Jackson so thought I'd test it out with this short story. I learned that this is a prequel of sorts to Someone Else's Love Story. I enjoyed the characters in the book so I may check that one out soon. It is about a young woman with a three-year-old. She realizes that he might be a bit unusual when he reads a banner on a wall and is able to solve a Rubik's cube in less than ten minutes but is fearful of what that might mean and tries to deny that he is anything but ordinary. It was an engaging read and I became attached to the characters quickly. It was interesting to get to listen to the author read her own work.

5. Gathering Blue by Lois Lowry

  I read The Giver not too long ago and recently learned that it was book one in a four book series. I read this second book in just a few days. It is about a girl, Kira, who has just lost her mother and is in danger of being removed from the village because she has a lame foot and the village does not tolerate flaws well. She is given a trial in front of the council and they allow her to stay. Her saving grace is her knowledge of weaving and threading. Her mother had worked on a special robe while she was alive and had taught Kira all she knew. She is given room in the council building and given the task of repairing and restoring the robe. She will eventually finish the robe. She learns that things she has been told are not necessarily true and begins to suspect the motives of the council leaders.
  The end of the book doesn't seem like a true finale. I'm wondering if the third and fourth books will carry more of her story. I am also now wondering if the characters in The Giver will come back in play and be part of the other two stories. I am engaged enough (and dissatisfied with how Gathering Blue ended) that I am looking forward to reading the next two in the series (Messenger and Son). I would recommend this series thus far. I cannot yet say whether the ending is satisfying. Gathering Blue seems unfinished to me.

6. Wild & Free: A Hope-Filled Anthem for the Woman Who Feels She is Both Too Much and Never Enough by Jess Connolly and Hayley Morgan

   This book seemed like a book for me. I do struggle like feeling not enough often. Sometimes I also feel like I'm too much for other people as well. I liked the format of the book. Every two chapters were paired together with a common theme and Jess talked about it from the "wild" side and Hayley from the "free" side.
   I liked that the book reminds us that as women in Christ, we are already wild and free, though many of us are not living this way. We are not meant to live tame, contained lives. Or God is not tame, contained or safe and we are supposed to be living like him. The book encouraged me to walk confidently in the identity and purpose I have in Christ. I tend to be more concerned with others' approval and base decisions on what I think others might think. It is stifling and keeps me from doing what I feel God is desiring me to do. God's purposes are not always understood or approved by people and I should choose to serve my amazing and loving God and trust in his ways.

7. Three Wishes by Liane Moriarty

  This book starts with witness accounts of an argument in a restaurant between triplet sisters celebrating their 34th birthdays. It then goes back to the beginning where we learn about this family and about their lives and what brings them to the scene in the restaurant. The three sisters - Cat, Lyn and Gemma - are all quite different. They have all experienced heartbreaks of various kinds that they have not necessarily shared with their sisters.
   I became engaged with each of the sisters (the book switches between their points of view) and desired for them to have happy, successful lives. I was very curious to learn what had actually happened at the restaurant and whether it led to a large rift in their relationships as sisters or they were able to patch things up. Another great book by Liane Moriarty!

8. The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing by Marie Kondo

   I had heard bits and pieces about this book, like talking to your possessions and asking if they spark joy. I have gone in and out of phases where I have wanted to pare down my possessions and have a more ordered house. This book seemed like it might be able to help with that process (especially since I am in the cleaning out mode at the moment).
   I enjoyed having a structure for going through categories in your house to do the decluttering and storing. I trust her advice because it is her job. I am looking forward to tackling my house with these new ideas in mind. Will I talk to my clothes? Probably not. But I do have a good guideline for determining whether to keep or toss.
   I am a very sentimental person so I am concerned that this will be my big hang up. She has done an excellent job of addressing my personality type and giving me encouragement and courage to tackle those objects in my house as well. I am currently on vacation and won't be back home again for a few weeks so I hope my enthusiasm and motivation will hold until I return. It seems like a good book for those interesting in living more simply and clutter-free. I cannot yet say whether her advice has worked for me. I'll try to do a follow up post if/when I used what I've learned in the book.

9. Messenger by Lois Lowry

  I was excited for this book to come up on my library queue as I felt the second book of The Giver quartet left things very open. This book picks up about six years after the previous book, Gathering Blue, ends. Matty, a boy who came from the same town as Kira, is living in Village, a place that accepts all of the outcasts from other towns, with Kira's father. In Village, the people care for each other and do not discriminate against people with flaws. Each person receives their true name from Leader that describes their gift and/or their true self. Matty is hoping to be named "Messenger" as he has been charged with taking messages to other towns as he is skilled at navigating Forest and does not fear it.
  Something has changed in Village and people are becoming disgruntled against newcomers. They fear that new people will cause a shortage of food, supplies, etc. A vote is taken and Matty is responsible for taking the message that Village is closing to the other towns. Seer, the man he is staying with, also wants him to bring Kira to Village from her home before it's too late.
   It is a very engaging read that continues the story and also weaves a bit of the first book in as well. I am now equally anxious to get my hands on Son, the final book in the series. I am interested to see how/if things wrap up. So far I am still very much enjoying the books and would recommend them.

10. Learning to Walk in the Dark by Barbara Brown Taylor

  This book is about our fear of the dark in its various forms - physical, spiritual, psychological. Barbara talks about how we have equated darkness with evil and that it is not necessarily accurate. Dark and light are not opposites but complementary. You cannot really have one without the other. God did not create darkness, it was already here. He formed and separated light from the darkness but you wouldn't really know one without the other.
   In the book she explores darkness and her experiences of darkness, sharing the importance of darkness in various aspects of our lives. She invites us to consider why we are afraid of the dark and whether we should continue to avoid it or perhaps, venture into it to see what we might learn or be missing by avoiding it.
  This book contains a lot of information and ideas that I am still processing. It has made me think about my own experiences with darkness. I found it very interesting and thought provoking.

11. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brene Brown

   This is the third book I've read by Brene Brown. She referenced some of her findings about living a Wholehearted Life in her later books because her research tends to build on itself. I really enjoyed this book. It talked about the three keys of living a wholehearted life - courage, connection and compassion. She defined each of these key qualities and also listed ten guideposts to embrace that help us to live wholeheartedly - authenticity, self-compassion, a resilient spirit, gratitude and joy, intuition and trusting faith, creativity, play and rest, calm and stillness, meaningful work, laughter, song and dance - along with the things that hinder wholehearted living that we need to release - what others think, perfectionism, numbing and powerlessness, scarcity and fear of the dark, the need for certainty, comparison, exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth, anxiety as a lifestyle, self-doubt and "supposed to", being cool and "always in control".
  I really enjoyed this book. I do want to live with more authenticity and this is an encouraging and eye-opening book that shows me what are important components to this type of life. I love that she warns that it's not easy but the vulnerability and work are worth it. I would highly recommend this book to others (especially fellow perfectionists).


What did you read this month? I'd love to hear your reviews and recommendations!

Pretending I'm Famous: My Imaginary Interview on The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey Podcast

I had received several recommendations about the podcast, The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey. I decided to download one and listen to it while I was on the elliptical machine at the gym. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It's like listening to a couple of your girlfriends talk about life, things they are passionate about right now and what God's doing in their lives. Most of these shows are between forty-five minutes and one hour fifteen minutes. The interviews are with some well-known women and women Jamie knows or has heard of but maybe are not in the public eye as much.

Recently Jamie started some bonus happy hour episodes that are thirty minutes in length and posted every few Fridays. They are often follow up interviews of people she has previously interviewed. She usually asks each person a similar set of questions.

The interviews seem like so much fun. It'd be neat to be a guest on her podcast but I don't really do anything that would warrant me the opportunity - I'm a regular SAHM not doing anything particularly noteworthy or groundbreaking.

But today is my birthday so I thought I'd have a little fun. I wrote down the questions she asked on one of the bonus episodes and thought it'd be fun to answer them like I really was a guest on her show. Here goes...

Pretend Jamie Ivey: Welcome to The Happy Half-Hour with Jamie Ivey! My guest today is Megan Byrd.

Me: I'm so excited to be here with you! I'm a little nervous about a live/recorded event but they seem like so much fun that I thought it would be fun to participate.

PJI: For those who don't know who you are. give us a little snippet of your life.

Me: I am a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) of two kids, a six-year-old and a three-year-old. I've been married to my husband, Adam, for almost ten years and we live in Acworth, Georgia, just outside of Atlanta.

PJI: What is something you've read, watched or heard recently that you cannot stop recommending to other people? Answer one or all three.

Me: Your podcast has been the thing I've been listening to that I think all of my women friends should check out. I get something from every episode, most notably book recommendations. I love reading so it's a great way to add to my to-read list and be confident it will be a worthwhile read!
   Speaking of books, I recently read Furiously Happy by Jenny Lawson. It is hilarious! It also speaks truthfully about mental illness and provides wisdom and insight for the rest of this. I love books that cause me to laugh, think and learn. I would like to warn that there is some language in the book that others might not care for.
  I also recently read and enjoyed Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty. I have read three of her books thus far and this has been my favorite. At the beginning you find out that there is a murder and then the book jumps back six months to introduce you to the characters. I spent most of the book trying to figure out who died and who killed them. I changed my guess several times but ended up being completely wrong. It was great!
  I don't watch a lot of television. My husband and I tend to stick to comedy shows to lighten our week and he usually is the one that introduces me to them. Probably my favorite of the current shows we watch is Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Andy Samberg is one of the main characters and I thought he was funny on Saturday Night Live. I thought it was going to be a dumb buddy-cop show but I watched the first episode and laughed throughout the whole thing. The whole cast is amazing and hilarious. Andre Braugher is amazing as Captain Holt. It's just fun and silly and also heart-warming in moments. I can't wait for the next season!

PJI: How do you recharge? What does that look like for you?

Me: As a SAHM without family around, this has been a struggle for me. I actually recently asked this same question to a new acquaintance of mine, asking her to recall what she did when she was raising her children. She helped me to get a better picture of what recharging looks like for me. Exercising is a big factor in my emotional and physical health. I have made sure my kids have kept an afternoon rest time most days (now that they no longer nap consistently) so that I can have an hour to an hour and a half to do something I enjoy, usually reading, praying and/or writing. Occasionally I'll take a nap if I'm feeling particularly tired. I have sometimes used this time to do chores around the house and I have realized that not using my "free time" wisely hinders my ability to be a patient, considerate, loving mom and wife the remainder of the day.
     I dream of having an entire day to myself where I can focus on being in nature and spending time in quiet solitude praying, writing and reading. It sounds so amazing to me! As an introvert, I need periods of quiet to recharge (hence my kids' Quiet Room Time).

PJI: What's a specific app, gadget or piece of technology that you cannot live without and why?

Me: My kindle. I LOVE to read and I think it's great that I can have a bunch of books in one place and it takes up limited space in my bag or suitcase. I can get books from the library or Amazon without having to leave the house. My kindle case has a book light which makes for easy reading in bed (yes, I have an older, non-backlit one but I use it daily).

PJI: What's a dream that you had when you were young that you've had to let go of?

Me: For awhile growing up I wanted to be an architect, but not just an architect. I already had the traveling bug so I wanted to live in an RV so that I could travel around the country designing buildings. I don't know if that was a very realistic dream, probably because I wasn't really equipped with the skills to be an architect, but it was fun to think about for awhile. I don't know that I ever thought it would actually happen.
      I think I'm very risk-averse so I don't know that I really dream big or pursue things that require a lot of risk. In college, I thought about going to graduate school for counseling but was concerned about having a student loan so I didn't ever finish the application process. I know it would still be possible to acquire a master's but it's not a strong desire of mine at this time. So, sadly to say, I can't really think of big dreams I had when I was younger that were not able to come true.
     I do think that I am growing in my ability to dream. I recently pondered this and realized that I do dream of being a writer who is compensated for her work. It has been a little scary putting that out there because sharing dreams requires vulnerability and there is the risk of failure or it not coming true.

PJI: When you think of your good friends, what are some characteristics of these people that make them so special to you?

Me: The special people in my life ask me questions. Asking me about what's going on let's me know that they are interested in me as a person and have remembered things we've talked about in the past. I am someone who many people see as a good listener and someone they can confide in. Often, people share with me but do not ask me questions and so it feels like a one-sided relationship.
        They also initiate contact with me sometimes so that I am not the only one asking to hang out. Not having family around I have learned that I have to reach out to have community but it gets tiring when it's not reciprocated so I really appreciate those who also seek to spend time with me.
         I think the underlying theme is wanting to feel important and known by others. When I feel these things then it increases my affection for the person contributing to these desires.

PJI: What's some of the best advice you've ever received?

Me: Take time for yourself. Do things that refresh you and help you reconnect to yourself.

       This was really easy to do when I was single and then married without kids. Once I became a mother I kind of lost myself in the change. One of the biggest adjustments of motherhood is becoming less selfish in order to give so much care to a helpless, fully dependent new family member. I was no longer able to spend time wandering around by myself doing whatever on the weekends or spending relaxed, unhurried time reading and writing. I had to schedule small bits of self-care into the day when it was possible (and some days it was not possible) and it was (and still is) a struggle to do that well.
      The biggest struggle for me is feeling guilty for doing something for myself or for wanting to spend some time away from my kids or family. I think most parents struggle with this guilt of wanting to give your family all that you can but knowing that you will become burned out if you don't refresh yourself away from your family responsibilities.
      Parenthood also changes the married relationship a lot. Those first few years of a child's life make yours very tiring and blurry. You can forget to purposefully and meaningfully connect with your spouse, something else that is also very important.
     Self-care and marriage-care are both very important pieces of a thriving family. I am continuing to learn how to do these things better. As we've risen out of the fog of babies and toddlers I see more and more the importance of doing things that I enjoy, doing things that we enjoy as a couple, and doing things away from the kids. It will benefit our kids as they get older and enter marriage and family life if they can see us successfully navigating these areas of life.

PJI: What is one thing you do that is directly tied to your success? Or what does success look like to/for you?

Me: I don't feel like I have achieved a particular success. Perhaps that's why I like the question which asks me to define success. I think at this point in my life, success is having a husband and children who know they are loved, cherished and appreciated. Success is knowing that I am using my gifts and abilities to honor God and serve others (loving and encouraging others with my writing).

PJI: What is something you're really excited about right now?

Me: I am really excited about spending time with family over the next six weeks or so. Living away from family, I really cherish those times we are together and able to connect. We will be spending the next week and a half around various members of my husband's family which will be fun for the kids and allow me little pockets of free time and a change in routine. In a few weeks we'll fly out to my family to spend a few weeks with them. I see my parents about twice per year and extended family usually only when we are visiting my parents in the summer so I really try to soak in that time. I'm excited that this family time is almost here! It also means school will be out (we're in our last week) and I am soooo ready to sleep in and have a looser schedule!

PJI: What is a pet peeve of yours?

Me: I feel annoyed at people who are chronically late. Pre-kids I was nearly always early and it probably bothered me a lot more. Now I have days where we are a few minutes late because it's hard to get everyone wrangled and out the door at the proper time so I have more empathy for other parents. I usually try to build in ten to fifteen minutes to get the kids ready but it isn't always enough. I know firsthand that anything and everything can happen when you're trying to get out of the house with children to an event that has a specific start time.

PJI: Thanks for joining me on this Happy Half-Hour! 

Me: Thank you for letting me participate. It was fun answering the questions!



Has there been a show or podcast that you thought it would be fun to be a guest on? If so, I'd love to hear about it. (When I was a kid I really wanted to be on the Nickelodeon game shows - Legends of the Hidden Temple, Double Dare, Guts.)

April Book Review

We're now one third of the way through the year. To reach my goal of 50 books this year, I need to have read at least 17 books to stay on track. At the end of March I had finished 20 so I could have laid low and read none, but I love to read so that obviously wasn't happening. I ended up reading eight books in April. You can see my selection below. If you want to catch up on my former reads, check out my posts from January, February and March.

1. Beautiful Things Happen When a Woman Trusts God by Sheila Walsh

I am one of Jen Hatmaker's email subscribers. One of her emails last month had a digital download of this book by Sheila Walsh. You may recall, I applied to Sheila's launch team for her new book shortly after starting this one. I recommend both this book and the other one (The Longing in Me). Sheila writes with transparency, vulnerability and authenticity. In this book Sheila weaves her story in with those of various women and men in the Bible who chose to trust God in different aspects of their lives. She talks about Abraham, Anna, Paul, Mary and Martha among others. She reminded me of God's faithfulness toward us and love for us. I especially loved the last chapter, Trusting God With Your Journey, where she talks about Abraham trusting God when he tells him to leave his current place without knowledge of where he was headed. That type of trust - moving forward without knowing how it ends - is particularly scary and difficult for me. I fear that I will either be exposed as foolish or make a mistake and make a decision that wasn't in line with God's plans. I was reminded that God is bigger than our mistakes and we cannot thwart God's plans, especially when our heart's desire is to follow his leading. 

2. Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things by Jenny Lawson

I was recommended this book by an acquaintance and checked it out at the library. It was HILARIOUS! I laughed out loud many a time. Jenny Lawson blogs at The Bloggess and has written for several years about her life, often about her experience with mental illness. She is very open and honest with her feelings and how mental illness affects her life. She has chosen to embrace her life and is determined to live "furiously happy". I appreciated and enjoyed her candidness as well as her unique and hilarious perspective on life. She is quite a character and someone you feel like would make your life better and more fun if she were part of it. If you want a book that will increase your understanding of mental illness as well as cause you to walk around with a smirk on your face from remembering things she wrote, please check out this book. If you are easily offended by crass words and jokes, you may want to skip this one. 

3. Jesus Feminist: An Invitation to Revisit the Bible's View of Women by Sarah Bessey

I have been having a lot of thoughts/questions lately about women, leadership and the church. I asked what books I should read about this topic and this was overwhelmingly recommended. I had read Sarah's newest book, Out of Sorts, and had found it a deep, thought-provoking read. I thought perhaps this would be similarly interesting and informative. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It mentioned a number of the feelings and thoughts I've been having. Instead of being antagonistic and confrontational, it reminded me that all of us should be seeking God and what he desires of us. Even if we are not able to have a leadership role in our church it doesn't mean we cannot still be effective ministers in our communities. It doesn't say that we aren't to question hindrances to women's ministry opportunities, just that our focus should not necessarily be looking for reasons to be offended. It offered a number of additional resources for more in-depth study on this topic. If you have been feeling tension with the church's view of women and leadership, I suggest reading this book.

4. Undeniably Yours: A Novel by Becky Wade

This book is about a woman, Meg Cole, who returns to her family home to run the Cole Oil business after her father unexpectedly dies. She is not interested in running the business but feels obligated to help sustain her father's legacy. However, he also has a thoroughbred horse farm that she does not want to run and gives the farm manager six months before she will close it down. She ends up feeling a connection with the manager but does not want to mix business and personal affairs. It was an engaging read with an emphasis on faith and its workings in peoples' lives which lent encouragement to my own faith experiences. It was a somewhat predictable/formulaic Christian romance novel but I enjoyed the ride and am considering checking out the next story in this five-book series. 

5. Searching for Sunday: Loving, Leaving, and Finding the Church by Rachel Held Evans

I have heard some about Rachel Held Evans and have read a few of her blog posts. She wrote the Forward to Sarah Bessey's Jesus Feminist. This book talks a lot about her wrestling with different aspects of the evangelical church and walks us through her journey of breaking up with the church over a variety of differences and slowly working her way back. Her journey is not finished and it hasn't been neat and orderly, but it is real. She talks about the barriers churches put up against specific demographics and her unease at this segregation and separation. She reminds us that the church is not perfect, just like we are not perfect, but God loves it and us just the same. I really enjoyed hearing about her journey and her experience with different aspects of the church (the sections are divided into seven "sacraments" of the church: baptism, confession, holy orders, communion, confirmation, annointing the sick and marraige). I would recommend this book for someone who has questions and concerns about the church, generally and specifically.

6. Jesus > Religion: Why He Is So Much Better Than Trying Harder, Doing More, and Being Good Enough by Jefferson Bethke

My church community group decided to read through this book this spring and discuss it. Apparently Jeff Bethke has a viral video on Youtube of a spoken word poem he created called Why I Hate Religion But Love Jesus. This book stems from this work as he attempts to flesh out the lines of his poem. It was an interesting read with some good contrasts of how religion differs from Jesus. Religion is an institution, a system of rules and regulations designed to help you be good. Jesus is a loving Savior who extends grace to all and invites each person into a living relationship with himself. I think it would be a good read for people who are new to Christianity. Those who have grown up in church may not take away as much from the book.

7. Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty

This is the third book I have read by Liane Moriarty. The first was The Husband's Secret and the second was What Alice Forgot. I thoroughly enjoyed those two books. This may be my overall favorite. I enjoyed this book so much! At the beginning of the book you learn that there was a murder at a school trivia night at the local school. The book then jumps back six months and introduces all of the characters and potential murder victims and suspects. It centers around three women who all have children entering the kindergarten class - Jane, Madeleine and Celeste - and who have broken pasts and/or secrets they are keeping from everyone. I was quickly enthralled and devoured the book trying to figure out who was killed and why. I kept changing my guess when new information was introduced and ended up being completely wrong, which was a wonderful happening. Liane spins a wonderful, captivating story with a dark underbelly. I was thorougly entertained and would highly recommend it. It'd make a great vacation read (as long as you don't have to supervise children as you might be too distracted trying to find out what happens next)!

8. Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide by Nicholas D. Kristof and and Sheryl WuDunn

I had heard about this book a few years ago and it was one of the resources sited in Jesus Feminist so I thought it would be a beneficial read. It is the research and personal interviews conducted by the co-authors. They visited a number of countries in Asia and Africa, interviewing mostly women about their experiences. They tell of sex-trafficking, brothels and maltreatment of women. They desired to learn how to best help women in developing countries gain a voice and status as a human being. The stories are heart-wrenching about things women and girls are subjected to simply because they are women and especially because they are poor and/or rural. The book also talks about various measures used to help improve the status of women in developing countries, using anecdotes from women they encountered and information from organizations who have had success in raising women's status. Two of the most effective measures have been educating girls and women and helping them to become contributing members to the local economy (such as with microlending programs). 
I learned a lot about the life of women in other parts of the world and ways I can contribute to improving the status of women worldwide. There is a large list of organizations that are successful in their specific areas of work. If you are looking to become more involved in lowering mother and infant mortality, increasing educational and employment opportunities for women or just want to learn more about life in other parts of the world, I suggest reading this book.



Those are my reads for April. Have you read any of them? If so, what did you think? Have any book recommendations for me? I always welcome them!

Fourth Month Goal Review

April has come and gone and it's once again time to check in on my goals for the year. You can read about January, February and March if you'd like. Without further ado, let's get to it.

1. One arts and crafts time with the kids each month

I wasn't sure what the kids and I would do in April. They both had their own ideas so I went with them. My daughter had received a Sofia the First sun catcher to paint in her Easter basket and wanted to work on that.

My son also wanted to paint and used the dot paint set we had to create a picture.

When those projects lost their interest my daughter decided she wanted to get out the art set she had received at her birthday and create a picture. My son had received a Paw Patrol coloring book at Easter and chose to color in that for a bit.

Finished creations

In between assisting them I decided to work a little on my photography, attempting to create images I could use on the blog.

2. Blog at least twice per month

I managed to achieve this goal again this month. I blogged four times. One was a book review for a launch team I was on. The others were just feelings and struggles and thought processes.

3. Grow in gratitude, contentment and generosity

A new friend introduced me to interactive prayer journaling this month. It is an opportunity to more clearly hear God speaking to you. It starts out by sharing your gratitude with God. My journaled gratitude has ranged from family and friends to medicine to the beauty of nature. It has helped me to remember that I have so much to be grateful for and, I think, has given me a more grateful attitude and heart.

I participated in a spring cleaning challenge in April which I thoroughly enjoyed. It helped me to clean out parts of the house I have been meaning to but kept putting off. I was also motivated by our neighborhood's yard sale at the end of the month. I cleaned out a bunch of clothes from my wardrobe, unused toys and too-small clothes from the kids (We decided the kids could keep the money earned from selling old toys and would use it as an opportunity to introduce the "give/save/spend" idea with money. Neither really understands the value of money yet, but perhaps it's at least a helpful start for the six-year-old.), baby things we no longer need and other miscellaneous things from around the house. Anything I couldn't sell in the fall children's consignment sale was dropped off at Goodwill after the yard sale. It felt really good to purge so many things from the house.

I didn't receive any feedback about whether sharing specific instances of giving went against the verse posted so I will once again be vague. We did give in addition to normal giving this month. I probably could benefit from increasing generosity with my time, specifically giving more undistracted time to my children.

Here are my verses for the month:

So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Gentile, slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. ~Galatians 3:26-28

I only ended up memorizing the above verse but it was technically three verses so I guess it counts. ;-) It was hard for me to get this one firmly in my memory.


So, tell me about your goals this month. What were you trying to do? Did you achieve it? Are you going to try again next month? Try something new? Fill me in!