Why Do We Hesitate to Share and Celebrate Our Successes?

  This is my 100th post on the blog! I wanted to do something special to mark the occasion and celebrate. Initially I felt a little silly wanting to celebrate something as small as a blog post milestone, but then I thought, why shouldn't I celebrate? It's something I'm proud of accomplishing.

  It also got me thinking about how women often seem reluctant to celebrate things they consider to be an accomplishment because others might not see them as such. They are excited about achieving a goal but downplay it because they are afraid someone might try to squash their joy or belittle their accomplishment.

  It's not unreasonable to think that someone may try to undermine our excitement. Most likely it's happened to all of us at some point in the past and is why we are now hesitant to express our elation when we do something that fills us with pride.

  Why do we allow others to dictate how we ought to feel about an accomplishment? Additionally, why do others (or sometimes even ourselves) try to rain on others' parades of celebration?

  As parents we often encourage our kids to be proud of their accomplishments. They put their dishes in the dishwasher by themselves? High five! They learned to ride a bicycle without training wheels? Great job, let's send a video to Grammy and Grandaddy! They aced a test? Let's go for ice cream! We are so great at supporting and cheering on our kids.

First day of preschool!

  And kids are naturally excited about even the little things. They think everything is amazing and don't worry about tamping down their joy. I'm sure somewhere along the way they learn to tone down their excitement, possibly from their friends and/or the adults in their lives. I don't want to think that I might be responsible for my children's loss of enthusiasm about celebrating the big and little things in life. If they don't see me celebrating my successes, what picture am I painting for them about adulthood?

   So why do we tend to downplay our successes and accomplishments? Are we afraid of having joy over something because we feel that if we do, it is opening the door for something bad to happen to even us out? Bad stuff is probably eventually going to happen to us. That's life. Why not celebrate the good when we have it to help carry us through the challenges and set backs?

  Are we worried that celebrating our accomplishments might make others feel bad about not achieving the same thing? Some people do believe that when others succeed or achieve, that it is taking away from their ability to do the same. This is a fear of scarcity, that there won't be enough for everyone, but that's not true. There is room for everyone. We ought to see others' success as validation that achievement in this area is possible and an invitation for us to also attempt it. When one person strives and achieves, it should to give us all permission to do the same.

  Belittling others' accomplishments most likely stems from jealousy. We are working on our dreams and goals which is quite admirable. Other people may feel that they are unable to do the same so they try to keep us from succeeding or feeling good about our success so that they won't feel so bad about not making efforts toward their own goals.

  So, yes, some people will not consider publishing one hundred blog posts to be anything noteworthy, especially on a small, unknown blog like mine. But, to me, it's one hundred times I've sat down and worked on my writing. It's one hundred times I've attempted vulnerability and connection. It's one hundred times I've sought to encourage someone else on the journey of life. That's a big deal to me and one I find worthy of celebration.

Where the magic happens. :-)

  In fact, I want to encourage us all to be proud of our accomplishments and celebrate them whenever they happen. It's okay to be excited about reaching a goal or milestone. Our success does not mean failure for someone else. Celebrating our achievement does not mean we are gloating. It is inviting others to share our joy.

  We should celebrate and be excited with those who are celebrating. We should be inspired and encouraged by others' achievements. We should be cheering others on as they head toward their goals.

  Today I'm celebrating one hundred posts! What are you celebrating? Have you successfully lost 20, 30, 50, 100 pounds? Did you win a local sports competition? Have you had an article published somewhere? Do you get complemented on your children's good manners? Can your son tie his own shoelaces? Do you have a baby or toddler and were able to take a shower today? Did you land a big client or order for your company? Did you streamline a process at work or home? Please share one (or more) of your accomplishments with me so we can celebrate together!

  To make this more of a celebration, I am going to give away a few things to people who comment on this post with an accomplishment or success they've had. I will draw five winners at random on Friday, September 2nd to win one of the following items:

• A paperback copy of my book, Between Us Girls: Navigating College Life as a Christian Woman. (Yes, I published a book - something else I'm excited about having achieved!) 
  

• A hardcover copy of Choose Joy by Sara Frankl
  

• A For the Love leather bracelet from Noonday

• An orange beaded necklace
  

• Love Where You're Going journal/notebook
  

  I look forward to hearing about others' successes and accomplishments. Let's celebrate together!

God's Reassurance

I have eczema (also called dermatitis) that affects some of the skin on my hands and face. It comes and goes depending on the weather, and seems to be more prevalent right now (probably due to all of the weather swings we've been experiencing). I am somewhat self-conscious about the dry skin on my face because it's noticed the most (obviously). It has caused me to question my attractiveness as I don't find the condition very pretty. This morning I was feeling particularly vulnerable to these thoughts and wanted to talk about it with my husband because he is good about reassuring me when I need it. Of course, today is the day he will be gone all day and I will not see him before I go to bed.

I was praying about all of this and asked why it seems that whenever I am in need of some sort of reassurance it coincides with the unavailability of my spouse. I had a thought and voiced it to God. "Are you trying to tell me that you want me to come to you for reassurance and comfort? Am I to seek my value and worth from you?" Well, duh, right? I know that God loves me, has a purpose for me, created me the way I am, and finds me very valuable. I struggle sometimes with claiming these truths and seeking peace and reassurance from my Creator. 

So I spent some time looking through the Bible to remind myself of what God values and finds beautiful. I first read 1 Samuel 16:7 to remind myself that God looks at my heart. The most encouraging verses were found in 1 Peter 3:3-6, "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment...Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and DO NOT GIVE WAY TO FEAR."

Image courtesy of surasakiStock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I have noticed lately that the enemy has been trying to use fear to immobilize me and break down my relationships. Perhaps I should spend some time reminding myself of all of God's do not fear proclamations in Scripture.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Do you turn to God first for comfort and reassurance? Do you have a verse that encourages you to keep going when you are feeling discouraged?

Living For His Glory

Image by suwatpo at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Yesterday at church there was a new person singing with the band. I was blown away at the beauty of his voice. It was powerful and passionate. I felt joy watching him use his God-given abilities for the glory of God. It got me thinking about all of the people I have seen using their abilities in a glorifying way. All of the members of the band at church do this. Our various speakers do this as well. So do the people welcoming everyone to church and those teaching and loving on the kids in the children's ministry. There's something so encouraging to me when I see the joy and passion in the face of the person giving of themselves in order to point to Jesus. 

While I was listening to and singing the lyrics of the songs and listening to our pastor speak passionately about focusing on what God looks at rather than what man does, it fanned the flame of my desire to live purposefully and to use my abilities for God's glory. I know that he has given me abilities with the written word. I want to be faithful to write regularly about my experiences for the purpose of encouraging others who may be facing similar situations. I know that God can use my words and my life for his purposes. That's my heart's greatest desire. And, essentially, that's my mission for this blog - to provide hope and encouragement to others. 

Does seeing someone else living purposefully and glorifying God cultivate a desire in you to do the same? What are abilities you possess that you could use to bring glory to God?

And take my life, let it be everything, all of me

Here I am, use me for Your glory

In everything I say and do, let my life honor You

Here I am living for Your glory

~Tim Hughes and Rachel Hughes, Living For Your Glory~